Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Randomize
