we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Randomize
