if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
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