the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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