I want to stick my p in your. b.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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