is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize
