Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
