Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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