New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Randomize