brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Randomize
