The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
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