So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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