god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Randomize
