its not stalking. its research.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
