Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
