I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
