Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I will be naked everywhere
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize