if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
