I could have mohawked her pubes.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
