May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Randomize