After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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