i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
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