it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
