Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Randomize
