worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
