Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
