Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
