I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
