So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
