I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
