I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
