what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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