what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
