I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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