you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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