So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
