Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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