u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
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