Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
