Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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