dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Randomize
