so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Randomize
