A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
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