is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
