everyone is single if you try hard enough
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize
