Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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