I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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