Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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