Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
