youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
